Becoming a Bridge Builder

Building Bridges – Week 3 

Philemon v8–16

The Grove, November 16, 2025 AM

Hearers of the Word:

I.  Introduction & Context ( 1–3)


• Short, personal letter from Paul’s own hand while  in prison about runaway slave Onesimus.
  
  
• Core Gospel Truth: In Christ, slave and free become brothers; social hierarchy is overturned by love.
  
  
• Paul’s Goal: Reconcile Philemon (A wealthy house-church host) and Onesimus without abolishing slavery outright; instead, persuade Philemon to exceed legal duty.


II.  Commendation: Building Bridges with Truth (4–7)


• Thanks in Everything:  Paul thanks God for Philemon’s faith and love that “refreshes the saints.”
  
  
• Focus on the positive: Not manipulation—genuine grace-based encouragement to act like the Christian he already is.
  
  
• Application: Begin reconciliation with gratitude, not attack; see the image of God in the offender, focus on the good done.


III.  Biblical Principles for effective bridge-building

        Principle 1: Operate from Love, Not Law (8–9)


• Paul could command (“boldness in Christ” = apostolic authority) but chooses to appeal “for love’s sake.”
• Love ≠ avoidance; love determines how we address issues, not if.
• Gentle appeal > legal demand:
• “Love pleads, while Law demands.”
• Lower voice, request gently, explain reasonably.
• Paul adds gentle pressure: “Paul the aged… now a prisoner” → Philemon must act; this is a small sacrifice compared to Paul’s suffering.

        Principle 2: Believe that God Changes People (10–11)

• Onesimus (“useful”) was formerly useless (runaway, thief) but now useful to Paul and can be to Philemon. 
• Paul employed a Literary Play on Name.  “Formerly useless… but now useful” (repeated 3× for emphasis).
• Bridge-builders reject cynicism:
• Don’t say, “I’ll believe it when I see it.”
• Trust God is growing everyone, including the offender.

• Essential mindset: Grace immerses the church; focus on present growth, not past failure.

Statement of Truth:   Love pleads, while Law demands

Doers of the Word:   (on your own)

Before you can help others restore a relationship look in your own life.  Is there a relationship that needs attention?  What are YOU own to do about it?




Are you on good terms with two people who are not?  What can you do this season to build a bridge and promote a godly restoration?




Pastor Steven asserted that Paul was not manipulating or gaslighting Philemon.  In what ways do you agree or disagree?  What can you do in your cultural context to apply the principles of bridge building that we are learning?